10 Indian Social Media Jokes

social media jokes

10 Indian Social Media Jokes

1. Twitter should make “Manmohan Singh” as their Brand Ambassador. The poor guy cant “voice” it out, but can definitely tweet his thoughts in public.

2. After the Pawar slapping incident, Dawood has recruited a lot of “Turbaned” friends on his FB friend list. He just pokes them when some poor guy needs to be PAWAR’ed ;)

3. SoBo Chick to Suburban Guy: I am surprised that Tusshar Kapoor has the highest number of followers on foursquare.com

Suburban Guy: I am not surprised. Everybody wants to know where he is, so that they make sure they arent :)

SoBo Chick: WTF !

 

4. To all my Gujju/Marwari Unmarried friends:

Please ensure that your wedding reception has a mandatory buzzer on the stage which rings after every 10 seconds. This is the only way you guys can ensure each of your million invitees end up greeting you – the harried (oh…i meant “married”) couple.

Next time, I am in a similar situation, I will just tweet my wishes to you!

5.  Name one person you would definitely not find on foursquare.com?

- Sharad Pawar.

Apparently, he deleted his account post the slapping incident.
His doctor has specifically advised him to stay away from anything and everything that wears a turban!

6.  UP police registered a record 80% reduction  in the number of Rape cases this year.

When asked about the strategy behind this achievement, the DGP said, “Sab Behenji (Mayawati) ki kripa hai. We have been showing a video of Behenji doing a pole dancing session on YouTube , to all our rape suspects in the state. 80% of the suspects have demonstrated erectile dysfunction after watching that video and rest have lost interest in sex.”

7. Suburban Guy (in a depressed mood) meets SoBo Chick..

SoBo Chick to Suburban Guy: Why so serious?
Suburban Guy: 10 months back, Our CEO tweeted about a trip to an “unexplored and unique travel destination” if our performance exceeded targets. He was true to his tweet. He finally took us performers to BIHAR
SoBo Chick: WTF ! :o

8. Suburban Guy meets a friend in Jail.

Friend to Suburban Guy: How did you know that i was in Jail?
Suburban Guy: Your foursquare account didnt register any check in since the last 3 weeks. I knew you had to be in JAIL.
Friend: WTF.

9. “The Ekonomy Ees going …” Even Pranab Mukherjee’s tweets in English would sound Bengali.

10. Interviewer to SoBo Chick: Why should we hire you for a Relationship Manager position in our Bank?

SoBo Chick: Cos i am good in managing relationships. I manage a 1000 of them on Facebook everyday .
Interviewer: WTF !!!

A sales and marketing professional with a flair for writing random musings. My musings take form of poetry, comic strips, status updates and sketches. I absolutely adore the shameless existence of the likes of Tusshar Kapoor, Pratibha Patil, Sharad Pawar and hence my works lack self respect of any kind. I make a constant effort to move ahead in life and hence i wear Rupa Frontline banian everyday. I love to be around intellectuals when they are drunk and stoned and most of my attempts at humor are inspired by their high spirits. I love social media. It gives me the freedom to poke random people which could otherwise land me in jail. I stay in Andheri (the word "gaa*d" was invented by an Andheriite...its truly the arse of Mumbai). Considering these are recessionary times, and like me you wouldnt have much work and a lot of time to kill...you can read my online comic strip - www.sobochick-suburbanguy.blogspot.com.
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