Why Checking Someone Else’s Facebook Profile is Not Stalking!

*Read this blog only if:

  • You are ‘Self-Proclaimed-Senior-Researcher-Facebook-Profiles’  (Probably 99% of people reading this. Definitely includes me.)
  • You have avoided talking about someone’s Facebook update for the fear of being labelled a stalker.
  • You have checked Facebook profile of a known/unknown person you are planning to meet.

Reading this blog may probably change your outlook of seeing someone’s Facebook profile & may make it a conversation starter hereon!

Scene 1:

Raj is all set to attend a match making meet fixed up by some aunt, who is as excited for Raj’s marriage as Sudhir – The Tendulkar Fan is, before the God steps out on the field.

Well, Raj has liked the first look of his to be future spouse and is excited too! But his mind is filled with various thoughts.

“What does she like?”

“Should I take chocolates for her? Which? Or may be its too pushy”

“Which movies does she like? Hope she didn’t like Humshakals”

Scene 2:

Simran has applied for a certain position in a huge FMCG company.

The interview is lined up for the next day.

Her mind too is filled up with a few thoughts.

The HR has marked her personal email ID as well in appointment scheduler!

Simran is curious to find out any common interests, conversation starters etc.

Scene 3:

Rahul has a business meeting lined up with Mr. Anil Singhania a leading industrialist. He has been trying to fix it up since quiet sometime. He wishes to start the meeting on a ‘not-so-formal’ note to begin with to create a connect. He is wondering what can be done!

We all have faced such/similar situations in our work or social life!

The solution for all the above is ONE!

Check out their personal social media profiles.


Everyone does it. Admit it. The only issue is, we claim we did not do it & cover it up.


Why is it EQUATED to stalking is something I don’t understand!

If the ‘so-called-checking-social-profile’ tantamount results in a better & a much more fruitful conversation, why shouldn’t we?

Everyone has information about themselves on Social Media. Certain information is for friends & family & certain is for public in general.

The information made public on someone’s personal social media account is by absolute will & intent of the concerned person. That is the information he is willing to share with public.

There is absolutely no shying away with the fact that you checked someone’s personal social media account, to understand the person a bit more for mutual benefit.

That, I believe, should be an absolutely valid conversation starter, if people start accepting it & stop being judgemental about someone who does so!

Raj can have a better first meeting with his ‘so-called-dream-girl’. He will know about her much in advance & can know what to talk & what NOT to talk.

Simran can know how is the company treating its employees, HR initiatives, probably some common friends with the HR (Yes, it helps for reference checks) and more.

Rahul can know which news pieces Mr. Anil Singhania has been following, which brands he loves, which political party does he support & more and strike a conversation accordingly to create a casual connect.

For those who haven’t used it to the fullest yet, Facebook Graph Search is an excellent tool to aid ‘Checking FB Profiles’.

For those who are interested to know what is an ideal way to check it using FB Graph Search, here you go:

  • Put the name of the person in this order in search bar: Name Surname
  • Select All People Named ______
  • Click on ‘See More’ on right hand side. Facebook Graph Search has excellent features to drill down to the right person in any corner of the world
  • Feed in specifics- Company Name, City, Hometown, Friends With…, etc.
  • Go to the person’s profile. Ting!

So all-in-all, checking someone’s Facebook profile should be a mandate in research checklist before meeting someone!

And be proud of your research & use it for a better conversation. But yes, DON’T STALK!